Last night:

Super Hearing Boy (SHB): “I’m going to sleep now.”

Me: “Okay, have a good night – I love you!”

A few minutes later:

SHB: “Mom, I can’t sleep. I hear termites chewing something. I think it’s the dresser Tanya gave us.”

Me: “You’re joking, right?”

SHB: “No.”  

Throwing the sheet off, I leave my comfortable nest and follow my son to his room.  

SHB: “I think the termites are in the wood trim around the mirror.”  

I separate the mirror from the dresser, exposing a mound of termite droppings.  

SHB: “See! I knew I could hear them!”  

After relocating the mirror to the living room far from Super Hearing Boy’s hypersensitive ears, I return to my bed.  

Two minutes later:  

SHB: “Mom, I still hear them.”  

Me: “You could use a little deafness right now, Boy. Let me sleep!”  

SHB: “It’s really loud!”  

Sigh. Once again, I leave my soft bed to save my mutant superhero from the sounds of loudness. We push the dresser into the dining room to await its fate, then I slide into my bed for the third and hopefully final time that night.  

As I wait for waves of sleep to engulf me, I’m awed by Super Hearing Boy’s supersonic hearing. I’m also somewhat thankful for my deafness, knowing I’ll never lose sleep over irritating sounds that have caused problems for SHB in the past. You know, horrid sounds such as the flapping of butterflies’ wings, leaves falling, or grass growing.