I could hardly believe my hearing aids when I encountered this customer recently at the Reference Desk:

Library customer:  I need to use a computer and my “liberry” card isn’t working.

Me:  Let me check your record – I’ll need your card, please.  Hmm.  It looks like you have lost book fees on your record.  Sorry, you won’t be able to use your Library card until the balance is below $10.00.

Library customer: (irate) What!  I ain’t NEVER checked out no books!  What do I need books for?  I ain’t read no books! The only thing I ever do at the “liberry” is look for jobs on the computer!

Me:  Ma’am, the titles of the books are, “How to Write Better Resumes,” and “Resumes that Knock ‘em Dead!.”

Library customer:  (with lots of neck action) Well, I ain’t payin’ for ‘em!  I’m going to ANOTHER “liberry!”

She spun around and defiantly marched out of the Library.  I wonder how many times this scenario will be repeated before she realizes all the Public Libraries in the County have access to her record?